A man goes into a bar with his pet octopus and says "I'll bet £50 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus CAN'T play'
The people in the bar look around, and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus has a look, picks it up, tunes the string, and starts playing the guitar.The octopus' owner pockets the £50 with a rye smile.
Next, a guy comes up with a trumpet. The octopus takes the horn, loosens up the keys, licks it's lips and starts playing a jazz solo. The guy pockets yet another £50 and his smile widens.
Jock, who has been watching all of this nips home and returns 15 minutes later with a set of bagpipes under his arm. He puts them on the bar and says nothing.
The octopus takes one look at the bagpipes and pounces, ripping and pulling with all of its legs. Puzzled, the octopus' owner says 'whow! What the hell are you doing? Why don't you just play the damn things?
The octopus says, 'Play it? Hell if I can work out how to get these pajamas off, I'm gonna fuck it!!