...for people like you and me - here
And just in case you thought the people in charge know what they are doing and Goldman Sachs wasn't a c*nt - here
If it wasn't so scary it would be funny
17 November 2010
16 November 2010
Introducing our daughter – at least in the virtual world
We had already had two conventional scans of the baby and they had indicated that everything was going ok, all the measurements seem to suggest normal development and the pre-requisite number of arms, legs, fingers toes and heads. However, the Aberdeen NHS has a ridiculous policy of not telling the parents the sex of the baby. So we opted for a private, 3D scan. A couple of folks who had already done it said that it was well worth the money. So last Friday we headed to the clinic in Aberdeen and they wired Katharine up to the machine, covered her with gel and had a look inside her tummy.
It was pretty amazing and after a few essential measurements, the operator went in search of the baby’s bits. We quickly deduced that she is a girl!
This was actually a bit of a surprise. For all sorts of reasons we were virtually convinced that the baby was going to be a boy. Not that we especially wanted a boy but we just thought that was the way it was going to be. And we were 100% wrong! We are both super excited about bring a little girl into the World and if she is anything like her mother she will kick ass!
From her private parts the scanner headed to her head. They could not get any good pics of her face as she was hiding. Either because she was shy or tried or both. So after sending Katharine out for a walk to try and wake her up they eventually gave up for the evening and said come back the following day.
Saturday we went down to the farm to see the new fences that had been put up around our land. All in order there and lovely to visit it again. We then force fed Katharine with sugar before heading back to the scanning clinic.
From the clinic we headed off to the airport for a flight to the Maldives. This is our last big holiday before we get to meet our little girl in person in 14 weeks and then, the World gets tipped upside down.
It was pretty amazing and after a few essential measurements, the operator went in search of the baby’s bits. We quickly deduced that she is a girl!
This was actually a bit of a surprise. For all sorts of reasons we were virtually convinced that the baby was going to be a boy. Not that we especially wanted a boy but we just thought that was the way it was going to be. And we were 100% wrong! We are both super excited about bring a little girl into the World and if she is anything like her mother she will kick ass!
From her private parts the scanner headed to her head. They could not get any good pics of her face as she was hiding. Either because she was shy or tried or both. So after sending Katharine out for a walk to try and wake her up they eventually gave up for the evening and said come back the following day.
Saturday we went down to the farm to see the new fences that had been put up around our land. All in order there and lovely to visit it again. We then force fed Katharine with sugar before heading back to the scanning clinic.
Once inside we had a lovely women operating the machine. She had no problems finding a very awake little girl, thrashing about in her mothers tummy. This time she was happy to pose for lots of pictures and even some video. She is of course beautiful and it was lovely to see her.
The 3D scanning people were fantastic, such a contrast to the miserable gits at the hospital. It was exciting to learn the sex and amazing to actually see her. I highly recommend the 3D scan if it is an option for you. It’s a luxury but a very nice one. It makes it all so much more real.
From the clinic we headed off to the airport for a flight to the Maldives. This is our last big holiday before we get to meet our little girl in person in 14 weeks and then, the World gets tipped upside down.
10 November 2010
05 November 2010
Friday Joke
Al Qaeda on Strike
Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement. The unrest began last Tuesday when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25% this February from 72 to only 54. The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.
The suicide bombers' union, the British Organization of Occupational Martyrs (or B.O.O.M.) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to its members and immediately balloted for strike action. General Secretary Abdullah Amir told the press, "Our members are literally working themselves to death in the cause of Jihad. We don't ask for much in return but to be treated like this is like a kick in the teeth." Speaking from his shed in Tipton in the West Midlands in which he currently resides, Al Qaeda chief executive Osama bin Laden explained, "We sympathize with our workers' concerns but Al Qaeda is simply not in a position to meet their demands. They are simply not accepting the realities of modern-day Jihad in a competitive marketplace."
"Thanks to Western depravity, there is now a chronic shortage of virgins in the afterlife. It's a straight choice between reducing expenditure and laying people off. I don't like cutting wages but I'd hate to have to tell 3000 of my staff that they won't be able to blow themselves up." Spokespersons for the union in the Northeast of England, Ireland , Wales and the entire Australian continent stated that the strike would not affect their operations as "There are no virgins in our areas anyway".
Apparently the drop in the number of suicide bombings has been put down to the emergence of the Scottish singing star, Susan Boyle - now that Muslims know what a virgin looks like that they are not so keen on going to paradise.
Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement. The unrest began last Tuesday when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25% this February from 72 to only 54. The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.
The suicide bombers' union, the British Organization of Occupational Martyrs (or B.O.O.M.) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to its members and immediately balloted for strike action. General Secretary Abdullah Amir told the press, "Our members are literally working themselves to death in the cause of Jihad. We don't ask for much in return but to be treated like this is like a kick in the teeth." Speaking from his shed in Tipton in the West Midlands in which he currently resides, Al Qaeda chief executive Osama bin Laden explained, "We sympathize with our workers' concerns but Al Qaeda is simply not in a position to meet their demands. They are simply not accepting the realities of modern-day Jihad in a competitive marketplace."
"Thanks to Western depravity, there is now a chronic shortage of virgins in the afterlife. It's a straight choice between reducing expenditure and laying people off. I don't like cutting wages but I'd hate to have to tell 3000 of my staff that they won't be able to blow themselves up." Spokespersons for the union in the Northeast of England, Ireland , Wales and the entire Australian continent stated that the strike would not affect their operations as "There are no virgins in our areas anyway".
Apparently the drop in the number of suicide bombings has been put down to the emergence of the Scottish singing star, Susan Boyle - now that Muslims know what a virgin looks like that they are not so keen on going to paradise.
03 November 2010
The USA, an entire country with ADHD
"An inability to stay focused on a task and boisterous childish behaviour are symptoms of Attention Deficit Disorder or ADHD. The American midterm elections have just proved that it is possible for a large portion of a population to collectively suffer from such a diesese.
Two years ago the US population finally realised that the republicans and their lame duck leadership which started a barbaric and immoral war and then bankrupt the country and almost the World by their reckless deregulation of the financial sector, simply had to go. And they got rid of them in style electing an educated, thoughtful and considerate leader instead of a bunch of redneck cowboys and a mad bitch from Alaska.
Then two years down the line, because everything wasn't fixed immediately, like a spoilt petulant child they suddenly changed tack and voted en mess to bring the loony bus back into town, but this time the people on the bus are bigger badder and way more madder than the previous bunch.
Statistics in the paper quoted that 80% of Americans were pissed off that the economic recovery was a bit slow, well hello, it took them 8 years and two wars to fuck it up, do you really think it could be fixed immediately?
Well actually no, they don't, because 75% of them don't blame Obama and the current administration for the mess...
So they don't blame them but they are going to punish them anyway hmm that's logical.
If the country wasn't so powerful and influential in World politics it would be funny.
Two years ago the US population finally realised that the republicans and their lame duck leadership which started a barbaric and immoral war and then bankrupt the country and almost the World by their reckless deregulation of the financial sector, simply had to go. And they got rid of them in style electing an educated, thoughtful and considerate leader instead of a bunch of redneck cowboys and a mad bitch from Alaska.
Then two years down the line, because everything wasn't fixed immediately, like a spoilt petulant child they suddenly changed tack and voted en mess to bring the loony bus back into town, but this time the people on the bus are bigger badder and way more madder than the previous bunch.
Statistics in the paper quoted that 80% of Americans were pissed off that the economic recovery was a bit slow, well hello, it took them 8 years and two wars to fuck it up, do you really think it could be fixed immediately?
Well actually no, they don't, because 75% of them don't blame Obama and the current administration for the mess...
So they don't blame them but they are going to punish them anyway hmm that's logical.
If the country wasn't so powerful and influential in World politics it would be funny.
02 November 2010
Camping in November
My old school friend Alan came across to visit at the weekend with Megan, his 10 year old daughter. He had been over in the summer, she had never been to Norway before. I had last seen her when she was about 2 and her parents were still married.
Picked them up from the airport on Thursday eve. They spent Friday visiting the sights in Bergen. This is autumn in western Norway at its worst, pouring rain, dark, overcast and windy. They managed the usual stops and ended up at the aquarium looking at bedraggled penguines before they called for rescue. They both seemed to have had a good day and were not bothered by the shitty weather.
I was in work trying to help the guys finish the applications for the 21st licensing round which were due at the printers on Monday. As with any big project, the last couple of weeks are always hectic and 3 key folk had been working til midnight and beyond to get it all done. I felt a bit bad when I bailed out on them a 5.30 pm.
Quiet evening at home on Friday night. Megan was more interested in watching Ripping Yarns and an extreme kayak DVD than Wallace and Gromit or Chicken Run (it has to be said that my dvd collection does not include much that is suitable for 10 year olds), but I thought it was interesting to see what young people gravitate towards. They just do what they are genuinly interested in, there is no pretention there.
Next day we visited the excellent Vil Vite centre in Bergen for a dose of science. It's a great way to spend a wet saturday morning. Saturday afternoon Megan was pretty insitant that she wanted to go camping so, never one to disappoint a small girl, we packed up the kit and headed over the Liefjell. It had at least stopped raining by this point.
We hiked into the hills before we found a spot that was almost flat and almost dry. Set the tents up and lit a fire. The rain held off as we cooked some tea and sat around the fire keeping warm. We even got to see an almost clear sky, with the plough, cassiopia and the milky way. Not something you get to see everyday in Croydon, or in Norway in November.
Headed to bed and although it was windy the rain held off until about 5 am. Got up about 9, had some breakfast and then packed up in the rain before heading back to the car. I would not normally go camping just for fun in November, but Megan was so excited about the whole thing it made it all worth while. Once again it is great to see the World through someone else's eyes. Someone who is doing this stuff, what ever it is, for the first time. It was also nice to just spend time with them both. She's a tough little cookie, which having known her mother is pretty odd, but she is. I am sure there will be more adventures to come. 
Happy Campers
Spent the afternoon getting the boat out the water for winter. Enlisted help from Sandy and after a few false starts looking for a boat ramp that was not locked, we took it to Grimstad and hauled it out. Lots of crap and enough mussles for a ten person dinner party attached to the bottom, will be good to get it cleaned.Then dropped Al and Megan off at the airport and headed back to dive into editing the 21st Round documents.
Playing with boats
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